Saturday, May 3, 2014

7 reasons why having sex with a robot is better than having sex with humans

You spend years looking for the right partner, or perhaps one drunken night, just to subject yourself to all sorts of risk to your heart or your career when all you want is a few minutes (or seconds) of pleasure. Today's society focuses on instant gratification, with new apps like Tinder skipping all of those dreaded dating steps of yesteryear. Well, we believe that in the future you will be able to take that just a little bit further with the sex robots currently being developed. Here's why you should forego the skin and stick with the tin:

1. No judgment or reputation risks: Sexbots don't judge performance or spread rumors the morning after. They are clean, quiet, and discreet and aren't fuel for social ridicule or ostracism. There is no illicit activity involved in their use and, at least as of 2014, you don't have to worry about blackmail at your kid's birthday party.


Cowboy Caught Cheating with Wife, Runs from Husband

2. Ready when you are: These robots have an on and an off switch, just like any other piece of equipment. While this statement may seem fairly straightforward, imagine the underlying implications. No foreplay necessary, no fights, morning breath, monthly timeouts or alcohol-induced incompetencies. Why waste your precious time?

Talk About Being Turned On
3. No diseases or unwanted pregnancy: Researchers in New Zealand are theorizing that by the year 2050, traditional prostitution and sex tourism could be replaced by sexbots who do not transfer STIs or have other complications. Imagine Amsterdam's famous red light district filled with Androids...

Match Made in Heaven

4. No guilt: Although we're a long way from a world in which sexbots reign supreme, the question has already been raised as a topic of debate: does spending a night with one of these love androids qualify as cheating? There is no unanimous agreement and the small majority views this relationship as infidelity but there is a growing margin of uncertainty and acceptance. At the least, if you're one of those who worries about how robot contact would be viewed by your human partner, there is no danger of that revealing sext message blowing your cover.

Anthony Weiner, Take Notes...

5. 110% creativity: Finally, try whatever suits your fancy, or stay away from those uncomfortable positions of the past. These new robots are whipped cream safe, just stay away from submerging in your jacuzzi.

6. Variety: Tired of seeing the same old person all the time? Looking for a little change on occasion but don't want the hassle of searching out new partners or being judged for finding many? The sex robots of the future have the ability to change personalities and appearances to keep the spice in your life. Whether you want new sizes, colors, shapes, or even languages, the (sex robot) world is your oyster....
"The best activities for your health are pumping and humping" - Arnold Scharzenegger

7. Low cost: Currently offered "companions" such as Roxxxy (robot lovers) cost as little as $995, require no wining and dining, and once bought will be yours forever. There are no unnecessary and costly doctor visits, pills, condoms, or any of the number of expenses associated with the romance world.

Ain't Saying She (He) A Gold Digger

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